So the other day I was just perusing the Dead Sea Scrolls and I discovered an omission from the bible that has somehow escaped modern translation. It goes something like this: "On the 8th day God realized that he did so much for man that he decided to throw in some creation magic for women too. Carried by a host of angels suspended in a sunbeam was born a red head so handsome that the only thing tying him to the earth was a gold thrift store jacket and jean shorts. He will be forever pursued by woman as he is the pinnacle of desire." Below is his only surviving image:
End of sarcasm.
A very special thanks to Sam for getting the most ballin' picture of me in his newly acquired thrift store jacket. The jacket is awesome. It's an amalgamation of European renaissance tapestry and an MC Hammer jogging jacket. I wish I could call it mine.
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